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Gnomes do not come to my valley often, and now I remember why I'm glad of that. They have this obsequious, yet patronizing, know-it-all style that is like chalk-on-a-blackboard to me. Whenever I run into a gnome, I'm reminded of how happy I am that this valley is home to elfs, instead.
"... By which you mean you see a contest coming, but you don't know who the winner will be?"
"Blunt, but well put, Baron."
"And you are here to take a side in that contest?"
"Indeed I am!"
"Which side?"
Lazar Weaponmeister does a mock cringe, "You cut me, Baron, but I can see why. Your opponent is no fool, and you know that. Allow me to offer you this as a reference." From the folds of his clothes he pulls out a scroll case. It is a rather ordinary looking one. He opens it and pulls from it a magic scroll. He hands me the case and the scroll to examine. The scroll describes a cantrip for starting a fire. It's quite valuable on a dark and stormy night, but it's a common traveler's spell, nothing noteworthy. I can feel the case is magical, but not unusually so. If something exceptional is going to happen, the camouflage for it is good. I hand them back.
He closes the now-empty case and holds it out to me. "Take the other end, and twist." I do so, and there is a slight eldritch pulse and an audible click; Lazar lets go.
I open the case again, and inside is another scroll. I look at it briefly, then hand the scroll to Gunther who reads it. "Another cantrip of fire starting. What proof is this of anything?" he says.
"Hand it back, Gunther. I see on it something quite different. It is a letter from my Ethics teacher in Florence... dated five years before we first met. I read it out loud for Gunther,
"My dear Iglasias, (I am told that will be your name)
"This letter is to introduce a trusted associate of mine, Philosopher Luarne. This is a person (I use the term person loosely here) with whom I've worked and adventured for ten years. He is honorable and trustworthy.
"He says this letter will come to you in time of great need.
"He says to tell you that one of his specialties is dragon slaying. This I cannot vouch for, but I will vouch strongly for his character, in general, and his adventuring abilities in particular. He is an old adventurer, not a bold one.
"Philosopher Luarne says you will bring me great honor, so I won't bother to wish that upon you, but I will wish you good luck. It sounds as if you may still need some of that.
"Your future, and past, teacher,
"Philosopher Nunchini"
"You see that?" says Gunther. I hand him the letter, "I still see a fire starting cantrip." he says, and returns it.
"An impressive recommendation... in many ways." I say. Lazar bows slightly, "What do you ask for your help?"
"I ask two things, Baron: first, my pick of the dragon's treasure... before you even get to see it. Second, access to your fine herb cellar."
"My herb cellar?"
Lazar smiles, "You may not know it, Baron, but your skill as an acquirer of fine herbs and spices preceeds you! I wish to sample some of your finds."
"So, you are saying that you may haul away all the dragon's treasure, and empty my herb cellars?... Do you want my women, too?"
"Oh... Did I forget to mention the women?" says Lazar grinning.
"And what do you offer in return?"
"I will fill these quarrels, I have more, with a substance appropriate to the task you require of them, and I will man... gnome, one of the crossbows."
I take my time thinking about this. The arrangement appears straightforward enough. He is offering his services, and willing to stand behind them in a most literal sense. What he asks is probably expensive in some way I'm unaware of, who knows what he will pull out of a long undisturbed dragon's cache? My herb cellars are fine, indeed, but I am not miserly about them -- given a choice between the lives of three fine ladies and a collection of dried up plants... there is no question of the choice there.
The question is: how did he happen along at just this moment, with a letter from a man I highly respect, written years before this man even knew me? As I reflect back on my days with Philosopher Nunchini, I now realize that there was always a little extra fire in our relationship, and I now remember again that his final words to me after our courses ended were, "There is a great surprise coming in your future. There will be many, of course, but there will be one that is beyond normally surprising. All I can tell you about this great surprise is: trust the messenger." Whatever is coming, this gnomish person has been preparing for it a long time, and he has uncanny insight -- this combination of traits is rare among those who are of chaotic nature, and Philosopher Nunchini would not tolerate someone of evil nature.
His name has changed... and my teacher addressed this being a "philosopher"? That remains a mystery, but a mystery that does not concern me now. I have made a choice.
"I agree to your terms, weaponmiester."
The gnome grins, "You have no wish to negotiate... check facts?"
"The facts you have brought with you are sufficient, and clearly the general wealth of this dragon's lair is not what brings either you or me here. I am ready to work with you, Lazar."
"Excellent! Then let us begin with an access to that fine herb cellar of yours...."
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